What do you see when you look in the mirror? Or perhaps a more relevant question is, ‘who is the most important person in your life?’ Some people will consider their boss or work as their top priority and of course it is important to earn money, support your family and have something, hopefully satisfactory, to take care of is important.
For others, relationships are the answer; your children, friends, family or partner top your list at all times. So, of course, we all know someone quite cocky who says without a second thought that they are the most important person in their life. They would buy tickets to see each other in concert!
Today, however, we are reflecting on the kind of self-love that recognizes that making decisions to take care of ourselves means taking responsibility for our own health and happiness. When we do that, everyone in our lives benefits too. I’d like to share some tips to help you deal with negative events, hurts, and disappointments that happen in life that impact our expectations and influence our worldview.
Here are ten ways to practice self-love.
– Introduce “reasonable” statements. Saying ‘I am beautiful / beautiful / perfect’ is enough to give many people a serious case of indigestion, but being reasonable in our internal dialogue allows us to say something like ‘I am taking positive steps every day’, ‘I am moving towards my goals and feel good about myself. ‘ Find something written in a positive way, that suits you, and repeat it daily.
– Do the things you do well. Even in fact especially in a busy life, it is important to schedule time for the things you are good at, so that you remind yourself how capable you are. Playing sports, baking a cake, doing some manual work, even helping someone are all ways to increase your self-esteem and boost your confidence and self-esteem.
– Encourage others to appreciate you. Self-love can benefit when others show that they value you, the help you’ve given them, or the ways you’ve supported their lives. Don’t worry about drawing their attention to your efforts and training them to appreciate it.
– Be polite when accepting praise. Many of us feel embarrassed or uncomfortable with praise or compliments. Instead of ignoring his smile, be kind and absorb. That way, everyone concerned feels good.
– Address the overwhelming and break difficult tasks into small pieces. Self-love can suffer when we feel overwhelmed or don’t know where to start. Could fear or perfectionism play a role in this state of mind and, if so, begin to address those issues?
– Build your team. Delegate, even to children at home. Let them feel involved and responsible for tasks like setting the table or folding clothes. Work encourages people to improve their skills; they may even have good ideas and better ways of doing things. Consider hiring help so you get the best person to do the job, such as your accounts, social media, PR, or marketing. Then you can feel self-respect as you perform the tasks for which you are uniquely equipped.
– Learn to say ‘no’ well. It can’t be the most positive word in your vocabulary when used in the right way, at the right time, and with the right person. Without it, you can end up getting ragged, feeling used, resentful, and stressed.
– Ask for help. Do you expect other people to be psychic and know what is going through your mind, how you feel, what you need? Practice self-love and communicate what you need from others. Communication is also about good listening. So be interested and attentive to your relationships and allow them to flourish.
– Take some time. Breaks are an important part of managing stress and learning to love and respect yourself. Identify the times when you normally start to feel down, tense, nervous, and find ways to take breaks before this happens. Go for a walk, enjoy a fruit, read a book, listen to music, take a relaxing bath. Maybe even put yourself in your journal like you would an important client, and honor that quote!
– Learn to say ‘yes’ also sometimes. Self-love is about stepping out of your comfort zone and getting a little scared from time to time. And often when we say “yes” to seemingly impossible opportunities, it is surprising how doors begin to open to support those situations. Keep a “happy” or “success” book and record those mini wins. Then you will have a record that will help you in more difficult times.
Self love involves all the different elements of your life. When you establish strong roots, the tree will grow safe and strong, able to withstand the storms that come its way. Then when you look in the mirror, you will see a positive reflection that is vibrant, joyous, and ready to break the boundaries of its frame.