“Not knowing or too scared to see what else was possible, I clung to our marriage for life until I realized I didn’t have to just survive. I had a choice: deal with my demons and dresses or live by halves. life in disguise. One by one I left my dresses … the power of acceptance took hold of me, and I had the mission to change my course “.

– Jo Dibblee, Put on your clothes; Living without disguise

For me, reading Jo Dibblee’s memoir, Put on your clothes; Living without disguise, it was more like reading The crystal castle by Jeanette Walls. Both books were a true revelation in terms of what some children have to endure at the hands of their own parents … and yet, despite such a difficult start, they still manage to get their lives back on track.

With parents haunted by secrets, guilt and shame, as a child, Jo Dibblee quickly learned to protect herself. Faced with alcoholism, drug abuse, and depression from her parents, along with sexual assault and harassment from an adoptive parent, from an early age, Jo began using a coping strategy that she later called “dressing up”: hiding her real me under layers of “dresses”. . “

With humor and hope, Jo shares the heartbreaking roller coaster of her life story and tells the truth about the dress: how she learned it and used it to survive, how she found out it was holding her back, and what she had to do, once and for everyone, to take off those dresses.

Despite harsh truths, brush with death, and agonizing betrayals, Jo’s heart shines through the pages of her memoirs, offering promise, wisdom, and inspiration to any reader who has learned to hide and yearns to be free.

Although I have not personally been in a position to feel the need to hide, Jo’s story inspired me. It seemed a miracle that Jo physically survived her incredible childhood, much less learned to to flourish in the way that she has. But she has thrived … and remains an inspiration to many, both for who she is and what she does.

I first came across Jo in 2008, when she was speaking at a women’s networking event. Then we went our separate ways. Eight years later, our paths crossed again at a different event in a different city, and I was surprised to hear Jo’s story. I immediately ordered his book.

Despite everything that has happened, or maybe because of everything that has happened, Jo is unstoppable in her commitment to empower women to reach their full potential.

“Dressing” means getting rid of whatever is holding us back in life. Our “dresses” may be the lies we tell ourselves, or they may be the truths of our past that no longer serve us. Our dresses can be our stories, our excuses, our shames, our habits, our coping mechanisms, our fears, our circumstances, our limiting beliefs.

Whatever it is, there are probably one or two dresses in most of our closets that should probably get your encouragement. There is certainly in mine … and reading Jo’s memoir was an important reminder that it is not what happens to us in life that matters as much as how we choose to respond. Because it is always a choice whether to keep or throw away what we no longer need.