If I didn’t know it before, I’m sure I knew it later. Seventeen years as president of a university convinced me that I couldn’t do it all, and I would fall flat on my face if I tried.

That’s a humbling leadership lesson that is universally applicable. But it is especially true in Development.

As they used to say in the Old West, He needed a Director of Development “to ride the river with.” Back then they weren’t just talking about a partner. They spoke of a trusted partner who “had your back.”

The CEO/CDO relationship is unlike any other in a nonprofit organization. This fact does not diminish the CEO’s relationship with the CFO or other officials. It simply acknowledges that CEOs and CDOs, if they are successful fundraisers, spend an inordinate amount of time together and had better be singing on the same page.

I tried to mentor each of the CDOs I had the privilege of serving with. Basically, he wanted a teammate, not an independent contractor. I needed a CDO committed to the mission who was a good communicator and crazy about raising money. But he also needed the CDO to understand a few other things.

I needed my CDO to understand that as a CEO, I was living with a lot of pressure on my time. My calendar could be filled with every topic imaginable, except Development, without me lifting a finger to do so. This happened because people wanted to see the CEO, believing that his problem is a priori. This is true for all except the top donors.

Top donors don’t usually call the CEO and ask for time on the calendar so they can give him a six-figure gift. Some good stories testify that this glorious event has occurred, but who can count on it? I always wanted to spend more time on Development, but the competition for my time was a tyranny that always threatened my good intentions.

The CDO must understand this fact of life for CEOs and compete for time on their schedules. CDO, we need you to help us get up and out of the organization. Take us to the market.

I needed my CDO to build a Development Plan that would fund the goals and initiatives in our strategic plan. He had to be involved, of course, but he needed the CDO to lead the charge. Consider some creative solutions and post the first draft. Do not wait for me. Be proactive.

I needed my CDO to qualify potential donors. By all means put people on my calendar. But to put it rudely, introduce me to some worthwhile people. When I periodically pressed my CDOs for more appointments on my calendar, they sometimes responded with a flurry of warm bodies. No, put me in touch with the right people, meaning people with the ability to give bigger gifts.

I needed my CDO to avoid perpetually entertaining a prospect and applying. Romance is important in the relationship, but sooner or later you have to apply to our friends. Otherwise, you’re not fundraising. You’re just spending money on lunches, golf, gifts, airfare, etc. Be an example to the Development staff in your own productivity. Be hospitable and profitable.

I needed the CDO to help me make new contacts. If we weren’t adding new names to our list, we wouldn’t be growing. Actually, we don’t even sit still because current donors die, move, lose their jobs, develop other interests, run out of money, and more. If old friends are the backbone of a nonprofit organization, new friends are its soul.

I needed my CDO to manage the Personal Development Department. CDOs must inspect what they expect, provide incentives, hold staff accountable, and monitor staff performances, not just their activity.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, I needed the CDO to represent the organization with integrity in a way that would build trust, bolster our reputation, and support my leadership. I got burned once and learned the hard way. CDOs who speak positively on the inside and negatively on the outside violate the most basic professional ethics. A CDO is supposed to “build”, “move forward” the organization, not tear it down or the CEO. CDOs who represent their nonprofit organization and CEO well bring credit to their organization, their profession, and themselves.

I’ve used the word “I” a lot in this article, but my experience as CEO of a nonprofit organization for a long time was not unique. Nonprofit CEOs need CDOs to sail with them.